Homesteading Diary 10
2007
11/24/07: Good Grief! Six months! Where the heck did it go? Let's see. We had Jacob's Cave in June, then again the first part of October. In the spring, we took birds to sell. Our friends, Roger & Geri, both went up too. They split the costs on a spot and set both their tents up on the spot next to ours. Roger rode with us for the fall swap, but We didn't even take anything to sell in October. We had birds we could have taken, but we didn't take a thing. We just went to camp, have fun, and shop. We did all the above.
We picked tomatoes all summer long and even into November. We dehydrated tomatoes and canned tomatoes, made tomato powder, and canned spaghetti sauce. We had lettuce for most of the summer. The carrots did well, although the cabbage got eaten to lace by some kind of bugs. Our zucchini had the same problem (bugs). When the sweet corn started getting tassels, Cyn & I went out & put just a bit of vegetable oil in the silks with a small plastic syringe. It sure worked. We got about 75% of the corn whereas before the bugs were getting 75% and we might have got 25%. We froze sweet corn for winter. GREEN BEANS.. I was tired of looking at green beans before summer was all through. We planted Kentucky Wonder pole beans. It took longer to get beans, but we sure had beans once they started making. and more beans, and more beans. We canned a lot of green beans this summer. He found apple trees one day and brought home 3 of them. He planted these 3 apple trees down the road a piece. So far, they're doing okay - so we'll see how they winter over. Wish we could get a cherry tree to grow here, but the winters don't get cold enough for cherries here, I don't think. We sold our Dexter cattle this year. Both the heifers were due to calve in late July/early August. I kind of miss seeing them out there - but we just don't have enough pasture for them. We did get a Boer buck, and we had bought a Nubian doe (Petunia). Gosh, she's pretty. She surprised us with twin doe kids. We didn't know she was bred when we bought her (and neither did the gal we bought her from). We named the babies Daisy and Iris, and they are really gorgeous. They are half Nubian/half Boer. We have 4 does that will kid early next year.
On another livestock note, we kept 3 gilt hogs & had bought a boar to go with them. Two of those gilts gave us piglets, and they were both really good mothers. They even traded piglets back & forth somewhat. The third never did breed, so we will butcher her when it's cold enough out. With all that in mind, this year we invested in a meat saw and a manual cream separator. When we got rid of the cattle, we figured if we want butter, we need a separator. He used the meat saw for the first time this deer season. Oh my gosh, it works so well - and the meat cuts are SO pretty. We wrapped up steaks & roasts in butcher paper, marked them with marker, and put them into zip-lock bags for the freezer. There's a grinder with the meat saw, but he hasn't tried out that part of it yet.
So the gardens did well. We have canned, frozen, and dehydrated tons of vegetables for winter. We have a deer in the freezer and a hog that will go in when it's cold enough to butcher her. We rearranged both the small bedrooms. We turned the one in the middle of the mobile, that's right next to the kitchen, into a "pantry" room. So the other bedroom will be our guest room. Cyn came up and helped me move the bed into there, and now it's just a matter of getting rid of empty boxes and arranging a few more things. We have been busy, busy, busy this summer - but I think we'll eat good this winter. We dehydrated tomatoes, green beans, carrots, cabbage, zucchini, yellow, summer squash, corn, broccoli, all kinds of stuff. Right before frost, we went out & picked a bunch of green tomatoes - and we still have tomatoes in tubs getting ripe in the kitchen.
We had not had a litter of pups all year. Then we got 3 litters of Pomeranians all within 3 weeks. Plus our Cavalier female is due next month. We are down to a total of 5 breeding females, 4 Pomeranians and the Cavalier - and 2 of our Pomeranian females will drop off this next year (as they will both be 8 years old next year). I reckon we'll probably keep a few of the females out of these litters and perhaps find us a new little male.
We had a nice Thanksgiving, down at Shanny's house. He did the turkey and a ham in the grill, and we took the meat down to her house. She had prepared a HUGE meal to go with the meat. We ate leftovers all day yesterday, but we'll have a small venison roast with cabbage, potatoes & carrots for supper tonight. I can't believe this year is almost over. I have no idea where it has gone.
5/23/07: The turnips are up already. It's supposed to rain this afternoon or early this evening, so hopefully. He filled up one of those big tractor tires with dirt, and put the comfrey plants in there. Also, we filled up the hummingbird feeders again today. They are sure hitting them hard this year. It's nice to sit and watch them out in the yard, though. They are very attracted to my red hot pokers too.
5/22/07: The gardens are all in. He put fence wire up in the big garden this morning for the green beans to vine up on, plus a system for the tomatoes to vine up in the salad garden. It all looks pretty good. He added red cabbage plants, green pepper plants, and more tomato plants to the salad garden, then planted more tomatoes in the beds around the deck. We ended up with a total of 56 tomato plants in! He did get the hibiscus planted also. I keep rearranging the rest of those pots, trying to figure out where I want the different things to go. I also have flower seeds & bulbs left that need to be planted too. It is supposed to rain this afternoon. Hopefully, we'll get a nice gentle rain that will be perfect for helping those seeds sprout!
5/19/07: Last weekend, Drone brought me home some ducks & geese from the swap meet. The ducks are khaki Campbell's, and the geese are gray Toulouse. There are 10 of each. They are just little ones now, but eventually we will have ducks & geese on our pond. So far this year, our rainfall has been great, MUCH further ahead than last year, and at least within normal - so hopefully, it will stay that way rather than the drought we've had for the past 2 years. Our big garden is all in. We planted 6 (yep, SIX) 50-foot rows of sweet corn, 2 rows of green beans, 1 row of beets, half a row of turnips, half a row of onions, about 3/4 of a row of sugar snap peas, and 4 hills of Sugar Baby watermelon. The "salad" garden is almost done too. We have 40 tomato plants in as of this morning, with some Early Girl, Better Boy, Mortgage lifters, and some cherry tomatoes called Tom Thumb (I think). Then there are green peppers, okra, and 3 hills of zucchini. We also got our rhubarb planted in it's own little spot, so it can just take over there if it wants. Yesterday, we took a break from computer projects and planting garden and went to visit some friends who have 2 greenhouses. My goodness, they sent us home with more tomato plants, bunches of different kinds. We had lost some of our tomato plants that we originally planted due to storms, so we replaced some of those with the mortgage lifters. Sheri & Gary sent us home with TONS more tomato plants, plus some red cabbage plants, plus a hibiscus, 2 pots of some kind of daisies, a white flowering Echinacea, a purple flowering Echinacea, a pot of thyme, a pot of oregano, and probably more that I've forgotten. There were lots of plants in the back of the van. So, that's how we ended up with 40 tomato plants planted. LOL There are still some Early Girls, some Juliet purples, and one mystery 4-pack. We still have to put the cabbage plants in too.
Drone weeded the whole salad garden this morning, then dug holes in each spot where we lost tomato plants, then more holes yet. He planted all the tomatoes in there, plus the green peppers, and moved some okra around, plus dug holes for the rhubarb, and the hibiscus. So he ran the Mantis, the post hole digger, and then used the weed-eater to trim weeds in the front yard and back yard too. I believe he had a full day in before noon! I put the rhubarb & the hibiscus into the holes he had dug - but the digging is the hardest part of planting anything. Shanna had sent me up 2 cups planted with hens & chicks, so I took those out and planted them in the rock garden. I thought I had lost all of the others, but we spotted quite a few that were still there. I thought we had lost the sedum too, but we didn't. It's doing good. It came back, and the first patch is blooming little tiny yellow star-shaped flowers. It spread itself to a second spot too, but that patch isn't blooming yet. I brought the big aloe vera plant outside. I think the cat may have finally managed to kill it, but it's fooled me before when I "thought" it was dead. I filled up all the hummingbird feeders last weekend, and we hung 5 feeders out for our hummingbirds. Because that late frost killed off a lot of the blooms on things, the hummingbirds and other birds really didn't have the blooms and things that they usually eat. Anyway, 3 of those feeders were completely empty today, so I filled them back up. It took 3 quarts of sugar water to fill them. I thought we had lost the rose bush out by the light pole because of that frost, but it has green growing on it as of today. All the rose bushes are doing good. We thought we had lost our trumpeter vine and wisteria too, but both of them are coming back. The sugar cane didn't make it, so he dug the old, dead plant up and that's where we put the hibiscus. Our white lilac is doing great too. The peonies are blooming, big fat pink blooms. So pretty. The purple lilacs were blooming, along with the dogwoods, the redbuds, the wild plum trees and the pear tree up the road a ways. Then that late frost came and killed off all the blooms. We wondered for a while if the oak trees would leaf back out, but they are finally doing that. I don't know if they'll get acorns on them this year or not.
We didn't get everything planted yet - but at least most of the garden is done now. I still want to put in some leaf lettuce & some half-long carrots up in the beds by the porch. Plus I have several more flower bulbs to get planted. and now pots of herbs and more pretty flowers. I did sort of set some of the new pots that Sheri & Gary sent home with us into the rock garden to see how they would look in different spots. The pots are still there, but we'll get them planted in there. I need to pull some weeds in there & get all the old dead leaves out of there first, so I can get those new flowers put in.
5/13/07: Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers out there! I had a fantastic Mother's Day. I got a 5-gallon bucket with a bow on top the lid. The bucket was full of pistachios, bridge mix, and cashews. YUMMY! I also got lots of cards, plus a hand-made glass "Mom" with a hummingbird on one end, a glass hummingbird drinking from a flower, and a tiny glass hummingbird that goes on a string. AND a pot of beautiful tulips. I had a great day.
5/7/07: Baker's Creek's annual spring festival was yesterday. For the second year, we had a big picnic and get-together up there. The food was great, the company was great, and the festival was great too. We have been kind of behind in getting our garden planted this year, but then we had a late frost in April that surprised everybody. So I guess it was a good thing we hadn't started planting the garden yet. We started our tomatoes, zucchini, and okra in seed pots in the house, so those got planted. Then we had a few pretty bad thunderstorms with a lot of rain, so our little plants took a real beating. I imagine we will lose some tomato plants, anyway. We had planted Early Girls and Better Boys.
4/23/07: This year has been hectic, and the first 4 months were sad & even heartbreaking for us. I read back over this year's diary entries, and I thought, "Gosh, this doesn't have anything to do with homesteading." After thinking about it a bit more, though.. homesteading isn't just about the land or the livestock. It's also about family, people, and our sense of community. It's impossible for me to separate it all into nice, tidy little categories; because it's all wrapped up together in my mind. I need to get some photos done and posted. I kind of let the website slide while Gramma was so sick, and then there were arrangements to be made afterward. So everything was quite hectic for quite some time.
About a week after she passed away, I thought I was doing pretty good, being pretty strong, and all that - until I went to wash the dishes one day. We each have our own favorite coffee cup that we use. Mine has flowers with my name on it. Drone has a Tabasco cup that he uses. Gramma's cup had a boat on it. We never put those 3 cups away in the cupboard. We drink enough coffee that we just leave the favorite cups out on the drain-board. Gramma used to get after our son-in-law every time he picked up her coffee cup, because that was HER cup. She told him he could use the "company" cups. LOL One day, a friend of ours came over and had coffee with us, and he picked up that cup with the boat on it and used it for coffee. My first thought was highly irrational, because I really just wanted to snatch that cup out of his hand and tell him to use a COMPANY cup - that one was Gramma's cup. I didn't snatch the cup away from him, and I didn't say a word to him. When I did the dishes, though, I washed the coffee cups up and lined them up in a row on the drain-board, just as we've done for years, with Drone's in the front, Gramma's in the middle, and mine in the back. Then I thought about our friend using that cup and how it had given me a small upset. I thought to myself, "Well, I'll just put that cup away in the cupboard so nobody else can use it." I picked that cup up, and I thought about all the cups and pots of coffee she and I had shared over the years. I thought about all the conversations we have had over coffee, solving the whole world's problems, sipping away. I cried like a baby over that coffee cup. I sure felt silly after a while, but it was probably good for me. I needed to have a good cry, I reckon, so I could start to heal.
This last weekend, we took off & went camping for 4 days. We had a wonderful time. It was so nice to just get away, and it was nice to just do nothing but eat, sleep, and visit with our friends for 4 days. It was just what we both needed. One of our sons came up & took care of milking and chores while we were gone. He has always been really good about helping out with things like that. When the kids were growing up, he was probably the last one I would have expected to enjoy a "farm-boy", homesteading-type lifestyle. His father hated living out in the country for the short time we did live in the country while he was alive. John was a city boy through and through. Shawn isn't. He loves it out in the country. He likes gardening and planting flowers and vegetables. He likes the animals, the livestock, butchering your own meat, all of it. It kind of surprised me that he ended up as a homesteading type of guy, but I'm sure glad he did. We are proud of all the kids, but out of all of them, with all the disabilities and injuries he's had to deal with, I really think he's done pretty well and made a good life for himself and his family.
3/24/07: Gramma C passed away on 3/23/07. She died at home, as she wished to. The hospice folks were great. We called, and they were here within 30 minutes. They called the funeral home to come & pick her up. Of course, those guys got just a bit lost. They came from Springfield, and our place is fairly ok to find in the daytime, but a lot harder to find at night when you can't see any landmarks. Drone had to go meet them at the blacktop & they followed him in. It was after midnight when they finally got here. She is in a better place now, and she's no longer in pain. I sure do miss her, though.
Of course, our adult kids explained it to their kids - but we have 4 granddaughters that live close by, Shawn's 4-yr-old Destiny, and Shanna & Jesse's 3 girls, Lexi (age 10), Nana (age 8), and CiCi (almost 6) - who were used to seeing Gramma "Cookie" on an almost daily basis. Every time any of the girls would come up here, they would go to the door of Gramma's room. I wasn't sure if they were just looking to see if she was *really* gone or what. Of course, even the bed was gone - because when hospice brought her a hospital bed, we moved her own bed down into the storage trailer. After Corky passed away, they came & picked up the hospital bed & all the other medical equipment. Anyway, after a few days of this, Nana finally piped up & asked, "Where is Gramma Cookie?" I looked at her mother, Shanna, who appeared extremely embarrassed and immediately said, "We talked about this, remember? Gramma Cookie is in heaven with Jesus." (Now, you have to realize that Nana is 8 yrs old, has ADHD, and is about 3/4ths deaf.) Looking at ME, she said, "Yeah, ok, I know she is in heaven - but I want to know how she got there?" By this time, ALL the girls are looking at ME for an answer to this very interesting question.
I attempted to explain it to them, starting with, "Well, when Gramma died, we called the hospice lady, and she called the guys from the funeral home. The guys from the funeral home came & picked her up..." which is all the further I got. This precious little 8-yr-old, who had been listening with every fiber of her being, reading my lips and really concentrating on what I was saying, got this light in her eyes, nodded her head, and said, "OH! So those guys came and gave her a RIDE to heaven." I was dumbfounded. Shanna & I looked at each other. I said, "Yep, they sure did," and we left it at that. I may have tried to give her a more complicated answer than what she was really looking for, but she came up with the answer that satisfied her. All she wanted to know was how Gramma got where she was going.
3/20/07: Gramma C called for me a few
days ago. I went in and asked her what she needed. She said, "I need to talk to
you". I asked her what she wanted to talk about. She said, "This is a serious
conversation. I tried to talk to Lee, but he didn't want to listen." I asked her
what it was about. She replied, "You know I'm going to die." Not quite
sure what to say, I said, "We're all going to die sometime. From the minute
we're born, we are all going to die sometime." She said, "I know, but I'm going
to die soon," and she reached for my hand. I held her hand and said, "I know."
We sat for a silent moment. "Do you think Lee will be okay?" she asked as she
just barely squeezed my hand. "No," I told her, "Not right away, but eventually
he'll be okay with it." "You will take care of him, won't you?" she asked me. I
patted her hand with my other hand. "Yes, I will take care of him." I told her.
"Promise me?" she asked. "I promise I'll take good care of him," I told her. She
sighed and smiled. "You're a good girl. He should have married you years ago." I
smiled back and said, "He did marry me years ago." She laughed, and said, "I
meant he should have married you years before he did." I told her, "My mom
always says the same thing."
We just sat & held hands for a few minutes. Then she slipped off to sleep again,
and I quietly slipped out of the room with tears in my eyes & dripping down my
face.
2/11/07:
I wish I could say Gramma C is doing great or even just that she is doing better - but
I can't. I have never seen anyone's health and condition deteriorate as rapidly
as hers has done. The oncologist warned us that the lung carcinoma is one of the
most aggressive forms - and I understand what he meant now.
Most of the time, she knows who *we* are - as in me & Drone. I don't think she
has mistaken him for someone else yet, but there have been a few times she has
called me Eva or Jolene (her daughters). She has called Shanny Jolene several
times (there is a physical resemblance) but Jolene has been gone for 5 years.
She is basically living on Ensure now, plus we sometimes get a bit of yogurt,
pudding, applesauce, soup, or cottage cheese in her. She will take a few sips of
coffee now & then, but she has trouble swallowing regular food. Every now &
then, she will be able to eat a few bites of something.
I made fried chicken one night when Christopher & my Mom were here, and she ate
a few bites of that. She did enjoy a few bites of fry bread the other night
also. Sometimes she is able to feed herself, and sometimes she has to be fed.
She has to have help to get out of bed to the commode, and she refuses to use a
bedpan - although it's obvious that it causes her pain to get to the commode &
back.
Yesterday, it took us about 3 hours to get her a sponge bath. I tried to have
everything set up and ready to get things done as fast as possible and have her
back in bed again because ANY activity just wears her out.
I put a bath sheet in the wheelchair (in her room) plus set up all the clean
sheets, etc., to change out the bed, plus all the other stuff we would need.
Drone wheeled the chair right up to the bed and transferred her from bed to
chair, then wheeled her a few steps towards the wall. I had a plastic tub (from
the hospital) full of warm water, soap, a washcloth, and a towel ready. We
QUICKLY stripped the bed & put clean sheets, a chucks pad, clean pillowcases,
etc., throwing all the dirty stuff in a pile in the doorway. I bathed her as
quickly as I could while still trying to be very gentle, because she could not
do it herself (although sometimes she will still wash her own face & neck). Then
she wanted deodorant, but trying to raise her arms up to apply it wore her out
completely & made her back hurt worse. I quickly put the clean hospital gown on
her & we put her back in the nice, clean bed. She rolled onto her side so I
could put a fresh pain patch on her.
After all that activity, she needed 2 pain pills and a lorazepam (which helps
the pain pills work better). We put the oxygen back on her, and Then she slept
the rest of the day. I took the pile of stuff from the doorway to the washer.
The grandkids made her some cards that we taped up on the wall above her bed.
She likes to look at them when she is awake. She sleeps a lot, but then she is
on a lot of pain medication. Most days, it's hard to get any of the other
medications in her, except for the pain meds.
There are some times when she is has a few minutes or even a few hours where her
mind is as clear as a bell, but they are getting fewer and farther between now.
I watch her slowly slipping away from us, and now I am sitting here crying as I
type this. She had a clear spell this morning and she asked me for a hug. I
hugged her gently, trying not to hurt her. She patted me on the back and said,
"It'll be alright honey". There she was, trying to comfort me..
We are sleeping in shifts, Drone & I. He gets up early in the mornings - between
3 a.m. and 5 a.m. & gets online. He might get to read through one board and make
a morning post or maybe two - until she wakes up. Then he gets her some coffee,
turns off the oxygen, and lets her have a smoke and sits in there with her for a
while, just talking, maybe watching a little tv, etc. He tries to talk her into
eating breakfast or something. I've been getting up somewhere between 8 and 10
a.m., then I take over while he goes to do chores, cut wood, or whatever needs
doing outside. I try to get her to eat some lunch, which she may or may not do
(more often not nowadays).
We both do evenings, as he will take care of meds, etc., while I cook supper and
do supper dishes. I usually try to do laundry during the early afternoons, to
make sure she has clean bedding, wash the hospital gown she is not wearing,
towels, etc. We both try to get her to eat some supper, or at least get part of
an Ensure down her. She likes the ice cream shake flavored ones, but chocolate
is her favorite.
He goes to bed around 7 p.m. and I take the late shift. She can have 2 pain
pills plus 1 lorazepam every hour. She never takes all the pain medicine she
could have, but the pills have to be put in her mouth, as she can't handle the
grasp necessary to do it herself. So I stay up till at least midnight &
sometimes till 4 a.m. - depending on whether she is having a good night or a bad
one, pain-wise.
She & I have our "talk-time" in the late nights. I will go in & turn the O2 off
so she can have a smoke & we will watch the food channel and talk for a while,
till she gets tired & drifts off to sleep again.
She can sometimes turn herself, sometimes has to be turned. We are right on
putting a special ointment on any bedsore as soon as it starts to appear. She
sometimes realizes that visitors are there (and even sometimes who they are) and
sometimes she does not notice at all. I wish I could say that she would enjoy
cookies or candy - but I don't think she can swallow them most of the time. She
has a hard time swallowing pills. I'm sure she enjoys the cards people are
sending her, but not
sure if knows who they are from or not.
2/6/07: The nurse did show up yesterday. She is very nice. Her name is Amanda but Gramma C thought that she was Tricia (sgrmtnhoney) at first. She does somewhat resemble her. She had a pretty good day yesterday. She ate some cottage cheese for lunch, then she & I had a pizza party last night in her room. We had pizza & soda & watched TV. She ate almost half of a small individual pizza. She took most all of her medications yesterday. Sleep is good for her. We don't wake her up to give her pills if she is sleeping, we just wait till she wakes up on her own & then give her the meds. She watched TV until around 1 a.m. and she is still sleeping this morning
2/5/07: Gramma C has her good days & bad ones. She had 2 really good days on Thursday & Friday. Then Saturday she slept a lot, but still was doing okay when she was awake. She was eating good. Yesterday, she was up 2 or 3 times but slept most of the day other than that. I did get some Ensure down her yesterday, but that was about all. She asked for soup, which I fixed her, but she was so sleepy, I don't think she ate a bite of it. She woke up around 11 p.m. Saturday night, and she ate then. Plus I set her up for a sponge bath & we changed her clothes, etc. all out. So, maybe she was just wore out from all that activity Saturday night. The hospice nurse called a few minutes ago, and she will be here in a few hours. I am looking forward to meeting her. She also said she located 2 hospital gowns for GrammaC. She said they are not new but if we wanted them we could have them. They are homemade, blue, and fasten with velcro, she said. I think they will work out great.
2/1/07: Well, she had sort of a bad day yesterday. She was just completely worn out from the long drive home the day before. She had sat up more that day than she had in 10 days. Today has been much better. She ate some breakfast, has taken her morning pills, drank a half-cup of coffee. She is awake & aware today, and is asking for pain pills when she needs them, etc. The stuff they have her on now seems to work much better than what they had her on before. The hospice nurse will be here tomorrow, so I think they have us scheduled for Mondays & Thursdays every week. So far, they have been absolutely great! GrammaC loves hearing all about what goes on with the board & we read to her what people have said, about all the prayers that have gone up for us, etc. She has appreciated it all. She gets a big smile on her face
1/30/07: (a.m.) We are not sure when they will let Gramma C come home from the hospital. We'll be going up there today, and I believe we'll be talking to the oncologist while we're there. He had them do an MRI on her back yesterday, and he called to talk to Drone this morning. The MRI shows that the cancer has definitely spread to her bones, and she has compression on the spinal cord from it - which is what causes the pain in her back. The oncologist said they could do radiation therapy on her back to try & relieve some of that pain - but he finally understood what she tried to tell him in that riding back & forth all that distance would cause her more pain than the radiation treatments would get rid of. He said they could put her in extended care while they're doing the radiation. We'll talk to her about it, but I don't think she will go for that either. By extended care, we're not really sure if he means like the SNF (skilled nursing facility) at the hospital or an actual nursing home that is a block from the hospital. I guess we'll know more after we talk to her and the doctor today.
(p.m.) One thing I missed above was that, besides the cancer spreading to her bones, she has a tumor on her spine that is causing the compression on the spine. They did send her home today, and the oncologist set it up for Hospice to come in twice a week, and they will set up a home health aide if we need it too. The hospice folks brought her a hospital bed, an oxygen machine, extra emergency tanks for if the power goes out, and a fold-up wheelchair. They will bring an over-the-bed table also. I need to rearrange some things in her room today. She was definitely glad to be home in her own room. She was awake, aware, and definitely coherent all day yesterday. She talked to the hospice nurse and told her what she did and did not want done, etc. The hospice nurse told her - You are the Boss. We will do what YOU want. She said, Well, you'll have me spoiled in no time, then. That's ok, I don't mind spoiling her a bit.
1/29/07:
I talked to Gramma C yesterday
on the phone - She was much more in her own mind than she was the night before.
The night before, she was not aware that she was in the hospital, or why she was
there. and she was *PISSED OFF*. I called & talked to the charge nurse after I
got off the phone with her - and told them I felt she was either having an
adverse reaction to the meds, or that they were giving her way too much of
something, or SOMETHING was going on. Whatever it was, they seemed to have
gotten a ways towards straightening it out, as she was much better yesterday.
I'm hoping they get it all straightened out soon so that she can come home. She
told the oncologist yesterday that she would stay for another few days, but no
longer than that. She wants to come home. I don't blame her, I would not want to
stay in the hospital either - but we want to be able to keep her comfortable
once they send her home too. They have her on a ton of pain meds.. Duragesic
patches at 75 mcg, Lidoderm patches for her back at 12 hrs on, 12 hrs off; plus
IV dilaudid, plus Oxy IR. They also have her on oxygen because her saturations
have been low, and steroids to help her breathe as they say she doesn't breathe
deeply enough. AND they are giving her the coumadin for blood thinners and daily
heparin shots both to keep her from getting clots. They said they could set it
up for her to have the heparin shots at home if she needs them. Whatever it
takes, we will gladly do it to be able to take care of her here at home. and we
will abide by her wishes as far as what she does or does not want to do or have
done to her.
1/26/07:
Gramma C had her surgery
today. They brought her back to her room, and the first thing she said was “I’m
still alive” (like she was surprised to find herself so). The surgery on her
hand went better than they expected it to, as they had to take less of the
fingertips than they thought they would have to. They had her hand elevated, big
bandages on her hand, and had it resting on an ice pack. The biopsy was a
different story, though. A hematology/oncology doctor came to talk to us in her
room. The biopsy came back positive for lung carcinoma, and it is not operable.
They feel that it has spread to her lymph nodes and to her bones. She told him
she did not want to know how long she had left. He took us out in the hallway
and gave us details, though. She is not a candidate for chemotherapy or growth
inhibitor therapy. Radiation therapy might relieve some of the pain in her bones
(and might not) – but she would have to go to W. Plains every day for 3 weeks
for a 15-minute treatment per day and radiation therapy will not do anything for
the cancer. On top of that, she said she didn’t think she could handle that long
ride back & forth every single day because of the pain it causes her to ride.
That leaves them with the option of trying to control her pain for what time she
has left. Drone took a guess at 3-6 months, and the oncologist said no – he
would say less, like around 2 months at best – or less. The 2 biggest problems
she has is pain and blood clots. They will be working on the pain control
issues. They are going to try to keep her on coumadin (warfarin) for the blood
clots for now. So far, that has not been working too well. If they can’t get it
working better, then she will have to go to daily subcutaneous heparin shots at
home. The oncologist plans to keep her for a few days to adjust her pain
medications and get things under control for her there. I guess that’s all
the news for now. We are still trying to wrap our minds around the whole thing.
One of our best friends said to us recently, “You think you are prepared for
things like this mentally, emotionally, etc.. and then you find out that you’re
not as prepared as you thought you were, because there really isn’t a way to
prepare for the impact it has on you.” And she was so very right. Right now, our
hearts are just heavy.
1/22/07: Well, they postponed the surgery. They admitted her last night for observation and found she had blood clots in both legs. Her toenails were dusky, plus her oxygen saturation was not good. They are keeping her for that & "pain management" and will try to do the surgery on Friday. So she will be there until after Friday sometime. They increased her pain patches to the 75 mcg instead of 50 that she was on before. They are also giving her IV dilaudid. We are hoping that they can get her pain under control plus do something about these blood clots, plus do the surgery while she is in the hospital.
1/21/07:
Well, it warmed up enough
today that the ice was melting off the trees and the roads - so we had slush on
our gravel here. Drone figured that, if it froze up during the night, he would
not be able to get out on the ice. He was worried about gettin up the *big hill*
on the gravel with ice & 2-wheel drive. So then we were worried about how to get
Gramma C over to the hospital for her surgery tomorrow morning, as she was
supposed to be there by 8:30 (which would put us having to leave here about 6:30
a.m. before the roads started melting tomorrow). Soooo... I tried to call the
doctor's office, but all I got was an answering machine. Tried to call the
surgical services at the hospital, and all I got was an answering machine. I
finally called the main number & asked to speak to someone in the ER. After
hearing just part of the story, she said, "Let me transfer you to the house
supervisor & see what she can do for you." I figured - Oh, Boy, here we
go. The house supervisor's name was Sharon - and she was very nice. She
understood completely. She said: I will have to get an order from one of the
doctors to admit her. Let me try to get ahold of one of the docs involved in her
surgery & see what I can get done & I'll call you back. Within about 5 minutes,
she called back & said she got ahold of Dr. Walker (the orthopedic surgeon). Doc
Walker said they really can't admit them the night before surgery because the
insurance won't pay for it anymore. BUT - her left ankle & foot have been
swollen up since she was in the hospital right before Christmas with that blood
clot in her leg. Dr. Walker said to bring her to the ER & they could admit her
overnight for "observation" of that foot & ankle because, if she still has a
blood clot in there, they would have to push the surgery back anyway.
So, they figured out a roundabout way to get around the insurance companies &
admit her tonight - so they won't have to go through the rigamarole of trying to
coordinate surgery schedules again because of weather & road conditions. Drone &
Gramma C are on their way over to the hospital ER tonight so that she can still
have her surgery as scheduled in the morning. I had to stay here to feed the
furnaces and take care of doggies & puppies. MM will be up tomorrow a.m. to do
chores. I am still doing a laundry marathon also. While Gramma C is gone, I will
strip all the bedding off her bed so she can come home to nice, clean sheets &
blankets too. Maybe while I'm here by myself, I'll get the vacuum cleaner out
too. Just wanted to keep everyone posted on the situation with Gramma C. I
will have to stay off the phone, as we do not have call waiting (and it
irritates Drone if he tries to call me to give me news and gets a busy signal).
1/19/07: Gramma C goes for her preoperative lab work today, and the surgery is scheduled for Monday. Just pray that the weather stays good enough that we can get her to the hospital for her surgery - so they don't have to delay this any longer.
1/17/07: FINALLY, finally, we got a call from the vascular surgeon's office yesterday. They left a message on the machine, and so I had to call them back. Gramma C has to go to the hospital in W Plains on Friday at 12:30 to get her preop lab tests done. She is supposed to stop her Coumadin & aspirin on Thursday. She will have her surgery on Monday morning, and she has to be there by 8 a.m. for the surgery.
1/09/07: When we were leaving the doctor's office yesterday, we heard him dictating her office notes into his recorder. The phrase we caught was this: "The patient has FINALLY consented to having the bronchoscopy & biopsy procedures." Today, she goes to have x-rays on her hand & fingers, with an appointment afterward to see a doc that I *think* is an orthopedic surgeon. Will know more about him after today. Then, the two docs will try to coordinate their surgery schedules and get everything done all on the same day. After that, she will be recovering from the surgery on her fingers and waiting for news on the biopsies. They have not put her on any antibiotics yet, but I think they probably will after the surgery on her hand.
Later in the evening:
What a day it was. This new doc said she has dry gangrene in those fingers. Then
he started talking about debridement, plastic surgery, and skin grafts. I don't
know why he would talk about skin grafts in an area where there is obviously
compromised circulation.
I looked it up when we got home, and this is what I found:
http://en.wikipedia.org
"Gangrene is necrosis and subsequent decay of body
tissues caused by infection or thrombosis or lack of blood flow. It is usually
the result of critically insufficient blood supply sometimes caused by injury
and subsequent contamination with bacteria. This condition is most common in the
extremities. The best of all possible treatments is revascularization
(restoration of blood flow) of the affected organ, which can reverse some of the
effects of necrosis and allow healing. Depending on the extent of tissue loss
and location, treatment other than revascularization runs the gamut from
allowing digits to auto-amputate (fall off), debridement and local care, to
amputation, the removal of infected necrotic tissues.
Dry gangrene: If the blood flow is interrupted for a reason other than severe
bacterial infection, the result is a dry gangrene. Persons with impaired
peripheral blood flow, such as diabetics, are at greater risk for dry gangrene.
The early signs of dry gangrene are a dull ache and sensation of coldness in the
area, along with pallor of the flesh. If caught early, the process can sometimes
be reversed by vascular surgery. However, if necrosis sets in, the affected
tissue must be removed just as with wet gangrene.
Treatment is usually surgical debridement and excision with amputation necessary
in many cases. Antibiotics alone are not effective because they do not penetrate
ischemic muscles sufficiently. However, penicillin is given as an adjuvant
treatment to surgery."
I looked at several other
websites, and all of them say the same thing, that gangrene is an extremely
painful condition. She explained to this doctor that she didn't want to fool
with skin grafts and plastic surgery. He said he would do the amputations if
that's what she absolutely wanted to do, but it was like he really just didn't
want to fool with it. He is an orthopedic surgeon and a sports medicine doctor -
but I guess he does mostly sports medicine.
We'll call her other doctor in the morning and see if they are scheduling these
procedures or not. She has definite ideas in her head as to what she will agree
to and what she won't agree to, and I definitely understand that. What a rotten
mess, and if Cox South had just kept her back on Nov 3rd like they agreed to do
over the phone, they could have maybe fixed it.
1/05/07: Talked to the nurse on the phone yesterday. Gramma C has an appt with the doc on Monday. They should have it scheduled & be able to tell us when the procedures will be by then. He is looking for a surgeon who will do the amputations of the 2 fingertips on her hand at the same time as the bronchoscopy & biopsies, so she will only have to be out once. So, in the meantime, she is just supposed to keep her appt on Monday. They also took her off the Neurontin, because they were making her sick. I was shocked that they would leave those fingers the way they were to begin with - but they said it was less chance of infection and more chance of saving more of the fingers. I think if they finally do surgery on the hand, she will have the pain of surgery for a while, but at least that will go away eventually. The way it is now, the pain is always there. Pain like that on a chronic basis has all kinds of bad effects on the body & the emotions too.
1/02/07: Gramma C decided today that she will go ahead and let them do the bronchoscopy & biopsies. Hopefully, the doctor she has can also find another doc to do the surgery on her hand at the same time.
Back to Homesteading Diary 9, 2006
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